My Apologies, Big Brother
by Case Number 241
Summary: I couldn't help but write this poem. It gives kind of an angsty side to Rick. If you no likie that, no readies this. (flames are welcome. do what u wish to this poem)
1. A Simple Poem

A/N: I'm sorry to all of you have images Rick as an evil bastard who's obsessed with killing Sonny. Inspiration called me to write this!! You may flame! (There will be no crying allowed!)

Disclaimer: No GH characters were stolen in the writing of this poem!

You told me,

I need you.

And maybe you're right.

You have a life,

Which I'll be forever

Jealous of.

I've tried to make you disappear,

But every time.

Every time something's stopped me.

You have no idea,

Do you?

I've tried so hard.

Feeling responsible is never

A good feeling.

I wish to turn back time.

Just once,

Hold me near,

Make me touch on wanting.

Consider love, big brother.

I know you don't need me,

But please see hurt in these eyes.

I know I owe you more,

Than a foolish apology.

Because you are more.

You haven't made this easy.

Your heart made of stone,

But maybe so is mine.

Please understand,

I love you.

I'm merely poor at showing it.

You told me,

I need you.

And maybe...

Maybe you're right.


	2. A Nightmare, gone worse

A/N: Well, I thought this poem would be a one-shot, but because of all the good reviews I've gotten and the show's inspiration, I've decided to write another chapter! Ric's POV, obviously! (Just a side note, if Ric says you or us he's talking to Sonny) OOC content!!! And I say again, you may flame!!!

Disclaimer: I don't own A Christmas Carol. (If I did, that would be weird because Charles Dickens is long dead) I did not steal any of these characters nor do I wish to (except for Steven Weber and Connor Bishop sexy accent , but that's irrelevant to this story)

I wake up to the sound of my tortured screaming again. It was the dream where I'm watching myself like Scrooge from that classic story every child knows.

What was it again? Oh, right A Christmas Carol! I remember Dad taking me to see it every year until I was about 12. By then, he'd said, I'd grown out of it and there was no point in going to see a foolish fairy tale. I now know that he hated the story himself and was tired of seeing it for his son.

As I crawled into bed last night, I knew I would have the dream, and it's your fault. You put thoughts of Mother in my head. This time it was a little different though.

While I was watching myself, you were there too, recounting every minute of the scene. Most times it's Mom who's narrating or Dad.

Meanwhile, a younger version of us struggled to open a gift. I'm never entirely certain what for; I'm always watching the image on mute. Sometimes, if I listen really carefully, I can hear squeals of joy emitting from our smiling mouths. My father sits on the couch; Mother sits on his legs like a child would on Santa's lap before Christmas. Dad's leg bounces Mother slightly in a nervous twitching habit. "What could it be?" Mother mouths, and this time it's as though your playing tricks with me, turning up the volume with some secret dial to let me catch those few words.

That would be the narrator's turn to say, "Look this is how it could have been, Ric." And then I would run out crying like the baby I am. The dream usually ends then with my pillow drenched with tears.

But you, knowing my next move, grabbed my wrist and said the line. You continued, "We could have been happy, you and me. We could have been the family you always wanted, but you had to go and screw it up." Your speech was over, but you keep a hold of my wrist.

I turned to you my vision blurred by the sudden presence of tears. You wouldn't let me go to cry outside the bay window and never look in on the view until the next time I dreamed this image. You wouldn't let me wake up from the terrifying nightmare. "Let Me Wake Up, Sonny!!!" I'm on my knees, begging with you. Your eyes are so stern and distant.

"LET ME WAKE UP!!!" It's then that I shot up in bed, screaming my lungs out. I'm choking on my own tears and, for that one second, wishing they could permanently strangle me.

A/N: Sorry this is so short. Please R&R!!!


	3. My Family

Next Chapter! Ya know I'm not exactly sure where this is headed yet but to hell with it!!

Disclaimer: Me no owns no characters!!

Brother,

It's me again.

Not to say I'm sorry

This time.

But to ask you

For something more!

Let me have my life,

My family.

You said

I was becoming predictable,

But I don't know if that's true.

I want a family,

Like yours.

You've known that.

Now let me have it.

You ruined my life too much.

I let you get in the way of

True happiness.

Don't ask questions, brother.

Just give me want I want,

What I need.

Let this one go, Sonny.

Let Christina be.

Give me the family.

A/N: quick poem. Sorry it's so stupid and doesn't make sense. Well, make it does, who knows. All in all, plz R&R!!!


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